Today we had our staff white elephant exchange breakfast x-mas party thing. It was really fun and lots of useless things from people’s desks were exchanged and that’s always a lot of fun. I mean, I know some offices people get each other nice gifts but this was meant to be a funny/stupid gift exchange thing.

Until it was all over. Then several people (4 to be exact) handed out cards and I got two gift cards from my big boss and a nice candle from my lesser big boss and I started to feel a little guilty for not at least having a generic xmas card to give to everyone. So yeah, Xmas at work makes me feel like a giant asshole, because I really thought..ok…we’re just giving random junk to each other I don’t need to spend money on people and then they spent money on me.
I know it’s not something us peons on the bottom of the office totem pole are really expected to give to people but it always makes me feel a little queasy. Like, I’m afraid to open these gifts because I might like them and if I do the though it really sweet and then I feel like omg I’ve made a huge mistake in hating you in office life for all this time and then I’m afraid I’ll start liking people more because of bribery and then I just sort of panic and come here and verbal vomit everywhere.
So, I have several hours until my work day is over. I’ll probably stop on the way home and get some cheap xmas cards or something, but then that might look like too much of an afterthought on the day after everyone else handed our their gifts. So maybe I’ll just skip it altogether. Ugh, pressure.